Post by Banette on Jun 14, 2009 12:41:27 GMT -5
That's right, ladies and gents. Step up now and get your photos of yours truly autographed absolutely free~ This is a one time offer, so better hurry while supplies last.
My Parents call me..
Behold, my good interviewer, the greatest living mystery of a man not even the Trick Master could hope to match! I am the original Mysticalman, the master Pokemon magician... Eusine!
*He whips his cape back with a flourish, leaving the white material to flutter slightly for a moment to returning to rest at his back, flashing you a confident smile that borders on arrogance. He takes his seat in the chair in front of you, leaning back and allowing his legs to rest on the table, appearing quite comfortable, all the while grinning, giving you the impression of having nothing to hide.*
Oho, don't give me that look. Eusine is my surname as well as my stage name. However, as all the world's a stage, you too may call me that. Can we move on?
*Seeing as you're most likely not going to get much out of this man, you simply check the top of your paper. "Percival Oliver Eusine" is scratched on the top in faded blue pen, making you wonder why you were sent to ask the man's name in the first place. Nevertheless, you respect his request and move on.*
My Friends call me..
SEXY (HEY SEXY!)
I'm not an it! I'm a..
MANLY MAGICIAN
I am a...
SEXY PROTIP STALKER GUY
I don't need wrinkle cream! I'm..
20. HRRRRMRPH TO YOU THINKING OTHERWISE.
Do you think I need a diet?
Pffffff I'm too sexy for diets.
My emotional disposition?
I NEED EGO GRATIFICATION.
Things that are Groovy:
SUICUNE. - Y/Y?
SUICUNE.
SUICUNE.
Things that aren't so Groovy:
BITCHES. - Like meeee
NOT-SUICUNES.
But..I'm afraid!
NOOOOOO THEY BE TAKIN' MAH SUICUNES
I like to...
VIEW SUICUNE PORNZ
My reason?
I FIND THEM SEXUALLY GRATIFYING TO MY EGO.
Mandatory Angst:
Mmn... Angst?... *He pauses a moment* Well. I don't really have any to speak of, I believe. Though if you meant past events... I was born and grew up in Celadon. I left home at the tender age of ten on my Pokemon journey to seek Suicune. I aged quite nicely and became the mysterious, yet irresistible eye candy you see in front of you today. *He runs a hand through his hair, pushing back the cowlick and giving you a charming smile before standing* If you'll excuse me, I'd like to call for an intermission. All this conversation about myself has made me rather hungry.
*As he exits, leaving you with the feeling that there's more to him than the lousy excuse of a history he just summarized for you, a Drowzee enters the room. Glancing up at Eusine, the Pokemon gives the man a polite nod as they pass each other, which Eusine seems to ignore. Perhaps it is his Pokemon, or was the Drowzee just trying to be friendly? Whatever the case, the psychic type climbs up into where the man had been sitting previously, motioning with it's hands to get your attention. Glancing at the Drowzee out of curiosity, you begin to find you no longer care about why it was doing it, nor the research interview you were conducting in general. No, you feel your eyes struggling to remain open, as you find yourself craving nothing more than a nice long nap...*
....
At a glance, you're not quite sure where you've ended up- blinding lights seem to be everywhere, showing up the moon, whom has taken to masking it's face in shame within a cover of clouds. The noise seems unaffected by the time of day- cars and people yelling are just as clearly heard as they might be during the day.
Duly glancing at a nearby neon sign, you squint a bit to read it. "Celadon Game Corner"?... Mmn. Don't mind if I do. However, before you can go in and blow several dollars on anything, what sounds to be whimpering behind you catches your attention.
Under a dim streetlight, sorely needing a change of bulb, you see a lone boy, no more than six or seven sitting on the sidewalk alone. Face down in his arms, his breathing comes in short gasps, choking back sobs. Poor kid. Wonder what--
Oh.
...Well, it would seem this boy had, to put it in a nicer sense, had his face rearranged by some jerk with a superiority complex out there. While you seemed to escape his notice, the boy seemed to flinch and perk up, bringing a now tear-stained shiner to your attention, along with a few other scratches, clotted with a mix of dirt and blood decorating his cheeks and limbs.
What were probably once frames for a pair of eyeglasses, now simply twisted metal and plastic were clenched tightly in one trembling hand, the boy making it seem as if he'd never let it go again.
He squints a bit himself in the light, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, glancing about. Biting his bottom lip nervously, he gives a small sigh and leans back against the pole, staring up at the moon with a small sniffle.
After eyeing the boy for several more minutes, it hits you- this is him! Eusine! But.... This bullied little boy seems to be a complete shadow of the exuberant magic man you spoke with earlier...
A sudden crash along with a yell is heard nearby, causing Percy, as you've dubbed him, to jolt to attention. Wide eyed, he scrambles away across the sidewalk, tripping but remaining on his feet as a siloetted figure not much taller than himself pursues him, yelling assorted taunts and insults at the boy in his wake...
Oh and by the way...
I'M SEXIER THAN YOU.
I'm just a proxy for..
A Banette WHO IS NOT AS SEXY AS ME OR SUICUNE.
Here's some of their writing!
EW GROSS
